You and I have been friends forever,
Always as friends, but never better,
Our own relationships could never bother,
Waiting for the day to be together.
Then time stopped, all at once,
Feeling like our life had shunt,
Imagining what could have been in all those months,
Unable to breath, air escaped my lungs.
Not knowing if you were safe,
If you had moved on to a better place,
Controlling my emotions, no better way to behave,
This tombstone you might as well engrave.
Had you moved on in the life of love?
Had you celebrated a major change, releasing the doves?
Had it been time for you to take off your glove?
Had you forgotten me in the stars above?
Low and behold, right under my nose,
You were here, near me and so close,
You were the one I would have always chose,
Now come into my arms and keep the door closed.
A life the universe willed us to live,
My heart is yours and my life to give,
My mind of future always adrift,
The damage done, now love redemptive.
Transferring into a university takes time and preparation. Getting started takes even more time and patience. Once started, there is very little time left. So, that’s where I am.
I still write often. Poems more so than fictional stories. I haven’t found the time to sit and focus on posting anything. That usually requires time to type, edit, edit, edit, post, reread, revise, repost. Aside from what I post, I am also using up my free time for a book I started early last year. No end in sight, yet.
In the meantime, I’m drowning myself in music and trying my best in life. A quote about the importance of music by Plato goes something like this: “[Music] gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything.” Or stated more bluntly by Nietzsche, “Without music, life would be a mistake.” So, with that, I turn up the volume for some feel-good music to blast my eardrums and continue work. I wish everyone to find contentment in life through their own tunes.
I hear the thunderous crash,
Of heavens speech,
Serpent score of lord and lover–
One is known of devotion,
The other of desperation.
Requesting what Shall be Done,
Is giving ones life force, and
Freewill to that of which,
Has no right to rule.
Ephemeral is then life,
Leading oneself higher,
Through a personal spotlight;
Only to shine downward, on
A demise inevitably true.
The flames of animosity,
Overwhelms the entirety,
All life evaporates–
So no cold corner,
Shall ever be touched,
Due to the fiery blanket,
That coddles me so.
The murky waters
Soak up thought
Barricading all that once was;
the flutter of a wing.
A road traversed
Leads to a glorious end
Unlike eating poorly cooked Indian food.
Not like nighttime
Consuming the air
A presence is felt
It is acknowledged
A fire somewhere inside
The bushes outside on fire
Look more closely
Two cars are near the fire
Citizen leaves their car
Another leaves the second
Two dead, on their back
Candles lie around
Two candles fall on the far body
Flames dance across
A message unclear
The couch housed a being. A body had slumped into the cushion and begun to slump further in.
Daryl couldn’t stand life. Nothing was wrong. The work he did was grand. His social relationships were healthy. However, he failed to see the light in life anymore. At times, it felt as if there was something resting on his shoulder. Something heavy. Something pulling him down. Something watching. Like the monkey resting on ones back.
A shift was made in the couch–Daryl moved to lay down. His feet rested gently on the base of the arm rest, while his head lay on a cushion. His couch was quite large. Closing his eyes, he began to question his quite sudden depression. In the attempt to find the culprit and eradicate it. As Daryl relaxed, he began to feel a tingling on the toes of his left foot. He looked, but nothing was there. Pushing it from his mind, he began searching for answers once more. Once again the tingling occurred. And, once again, nothing. Daryl shifted his foot that held the annoyance away from the edge of the couch. He imagined that someone was tickling his foot in an odd way, but he knew nobody else was home. In fact, he was the only resident. Within the search of answers to his sudden depression, some thoughts came to him. That maybe something he experienced from his past is coming back to birth itself anew into his emotions. To attach itself to his psyche and multiply until something is felt. He remembered his cat, Barley. Barley had died very young and it tore through Daryl. He never got over the death, always blaming himself for it, and it came up every so often. But Daryl didn’t think that was the cause of such severe depression. Memories of Barley flooded his thoughts. The memories that made you smile and tear up. Good remembrances. How Barley would always greet Daryl when he came home. Or, feeding him little bits of sweet desserts when Daryl was in the kitchen. Or, how Barley always slept against Daryl at night–either directly next to him or close by on a neighboring pillow. A smile spread across Daryl’s face. However, as if it was on cue, and as if the good memories led up to this point in a sadistic way, the death of Barley ended the pleasant memories. Like drop of black dye in a clear glass of water. Continue reading Knock Knock pt. 3